I took a picture of this saying, hanging on the walls of the rehab center where my mom is now staying.

How do we do this?

When people in your life do not do the right things.

When the Bible tells us to honor parents and respect spouses… and doesn’t give any out for how they are acting or treating you.

For eleven days I stayed in a hotel (actually I wasn’t there very much). I looked after my dad at home who has dementia and my mom in rehab with a broken hip. With my mom there were trips back to the Emergency room for fluid on her lungs and a diagnosis of Congestive Heart Failure. Luckily it was cleared up quickly with Lasix, and an Echocardiogram showed a strong heart afterwards.

Then there was the bronchitis that followed in my mom. And a disastrous trip to her Orthopedic follow-up appointment. And her trying to get out of doing her Physical Therapy in rehab. And her telling me she is going to do “as little as possible”.

I did it for my brother. He is trying to work and take care of his family. Since he lives close to my parents, and I live two hours away, he bears the brunt of taking care of them. He went on a much needed vacation. When I saw him after he first got home, he was very relaxed. Then we both went back to the rehab… me to deliver my mom’s clothes that I had just washed… him to let her know he was back in town and taking back over.

And I saw the tension return… in his face and shoulders. The stress is overwhelming, dealing with parents with dementia who won’t do the things they need to do to help themselves… and haven’t for a life time. And right now, I’m crying for my brother. It’s not fair. Not at all. If people did the right things, life would not be so hard for others. But, they just will not do the right things.

When I got home, there was no toilet paper in the house. Luckily I had extra boxes of Kleenex. There was no bread, but I was supposed to go back to fixing breakfast. I stood late Sunday night, handwashing a huge pile of dirty dishes, feeling like I would drop dead in the floor any minute. Then I fed and resurrected my sourdough starter, pulled out the bread machine and dumped ingredients in so we would have bread for our breakfast. I went to bed at midnight.

Little black centipedes were all over the basement (they come in when it rains a lot) on the garage side and the side we live in. Our daughter had our twelve year old grandson vacuum them up on one day when she came over to weed the garden. I’m thankful for that. I sprayed vinegar at the garage door and asked my husband to vacuum the garage today. I will vacuum all the rest of the house.

And… everyone is happy… except me…. and my brother.

Don’t get me wrong… I am grateful when my husband weeds the rock patio or takes my car to get the air conditioner fixed… but there is just too much work to do around here, and it’s just gross to have to try to walk on your floor without stepping on worms. And I’m the one that cares about getting the work done.

So how??? How do you cope. How do you “see the best in people”? How do you “forgive the worst”?

The only thing I know is to depend on God to get you through this life without losing your sanity. I hold Him to His Words in 2 Timothy 1:7… “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

A sound mind… exactly what I need when I feel like I’m on a roller coaster with people’s ups and downs, and I can’t get off.

And then knowing that God gets angry helps. I don’t feel so sinful when I know… God gets angry when people don’t do the right things… like when the Bible says…

“So Solomon did evil in the eyes of the LORD; he did not follow the LORD completely, as David his father had done.” 1 Kings 11:6 (NIV)

Solomon started worshipping the gods of his many wives… and God’s Words continue…

“The LORD became angry with Solomon because his heart had turned away from the LORD, the God of Israel, who had appeared to him twice.” 1 Kings 11:9 (NIV)

And then this week Romans 14:1 really stuck with me… “Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters.” (NIV)

Are all these matters disputable? Does it matter that we don’t have bread or toilet paper? I’m going to the grocery store today. And I’m thanking God that I have the strength, mind, and ability to see I need those things and a car to go get them in. I’ll vacuum up the worms and clean the house and I’m thankful that God gives me the strength and ability to do that.

Work is good. Those who want to take it easy and not work, don’t know what they are missing.

I quote this all the time…

“Do what is easy and life will be hard,

Do what is hard and life will be easy.” – Les Brown

The people I’m around don’t believe those words, but they are so true. If you do your physical therapy (just a little hard), then you will be able to walk. If you don’t do your physical therapy (doing the easy thing)… then life will be hard when you can’t walk.

In Psalm 105 it tells the story of Israel and of Joseph being sent to Egypt to make a way to feed the Hebrew people when a famine comes to the land.

Psalm 105:17-19 says, “… and he sent a man before them —Joseph, sold as a slave. They bruised his feet with shackles, his neck was put in irons, till what he foretold came to pass, till the word of the LORD proved him true.” (NIV)

As Joseph’s story shows, eventually God releases us from our prisons in life. And so we can cling to that. In the meantime, we just have to forgive the best we can, overlook faults, and dream of better days.

And… hang on to this…

“I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.” Psalm 27:13-14 (NIV)

I am grateful the LORD tells me that “I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.” That’s another promise from God’s Word that I hold on to.

What promises of God are you holding on to this week?

Please share in the comments below.